5.3 Christ as Us
© 2016 Christ Revealed Bible Institute
The beginning of our interaction with every Word God speaks must be fear and trembling; God must defend Himself against all who play games with God. Yet as that every Word enters into us, we discover with joy unspeakable and full of glory that this same Jesus has become the only life we are. Jesus now lives as us.
Before Jesus becomes the Body of Christ. Before Jesus becomes the Kingdom. Jesus first becomes us, personal and real, now and forever. I want to delineate, not why or how, but what that means.
I Am Never Alone
It has been eight years, now, that I have known, full and real, that Jesus Himself in Person lives now as me, as the only life I am, that everything I find myself to be in the present moment is Jesus expressing Himself in me, to me, and through me. What, exactly, does that mean to me?
The first thing Christ as me means to me is that I am NEVER alone. Let me explain. I am at this moment of writing caught inside a full-blown Asperger’s crisis. I am frightened out of my wits and I do not know what to do. Both options before me are equally impossible, and I have a long history of having such things go to open humiliation.
Asperger’s
My only coping mechanism is to put full blinders on and do the only thing I know to do, which, at this time in my life, is to write these letters to you.
Now, understand, this ability of mine to focus and to see and share with you the patterns of God comes out of this very same Asperger’s. And my inability to pretend and to play games with God comes out of this very same Asperger’s. And the exploding of wrenching public humiliation has come, so many times, out of this same Asperger’s.
I’ll be 60 years old in a few days; humiliation is not an easy thing to endure, no matter how well I know it.
Augustine on Steroids
And for decades I was taught inside of deeper truth circles, which I now define as “Augustine on steroids,” that my “problem” was that I was living in the flesh. And the solution to my problem was for me to get out of the flesh and into the spirit, to hear God’s counsel and do what God says, and then I would not be making these mistakes.
And every one of these qualities of Asperger’s, both positive and negative, have been called by anointed, godly, well-meaning ministers of Christ as being “of the flesh.” That is, “wicked, and in rebellion against God.” Yet all I could see when I looked at their counsel, and their image of “Christ,” was an abyss of fakery and pretending.
It’s Jesus
Even knowing Christ living as me, for the first five years of sending out these letters, I was still hit now and then by the soul-numbing realization that I am totally false and that you will now find me out. Yet even in those awful moments I just kept on writing in agony of soul, not knowing what else to do. If you want to read from such a time, read God of the Cup in The Covenant.
When I am frightened out of my wits, I know that Jesus is living as me, that even my agony of heart is Jesus. When I don’t know what to do, it’s Jesus. When humiliation blows up in my face, He is sharing every particle of my horror utterly with me.
Jesus Sharing Himself with Me
When I put the blinders on hoping that what I ignore will go away, it’s Jesus living as me. When I am caught in pain and confusion I cannot understand, it’s Jesus Himself living now as me. When I write all this stuff as if I am some “minister of Christ,” knowing I am no such thing, it’s Jesus living as me. When I break in agony before a holy and an implacable God, it’s Jesus sharing Himself entirely with me.
I am never in the flesh. I am never alone. All His ways concerning me are perfect. Jesus never leads me wrong; He does all things well; He has never not been sharing Himself with me.
He Carries Me
I will never know Jesus in His power until I know Him, absolutely, in and as my searing inability. Surely, He bears my griefs and He carries my sorrows. And all of my sin, all of my wickedness and rebellion, all that God cannot look upon, Jesus has already become and has already taken all of it into an empty, empty grave.
As I stand naked and alone before the Almighty to give Him an account of my life, only one word is found upon my lips – Jesus. And inside this autistic gifting and awfulness, there is one thing I know by this same Jesus – God really, really likes me. There is nothing the Almighty would rather do than spend time with me.
Salvation Is For Losers
I am never, ever alone. And against all those who say, “Hey, brother, why aren’t you trusting God,” I close my ears. I will NOT hear them. Jesus IS the only life I am. Whatever I find myself to be in every present moment is only He, sharing Himself with me. And all that I find myself to be, regardless, He carries entirely inside Himself, inside His Heart, inside of Father.
Salvation is for losers; Jesus is for those who cannot ever please God. The has-beens, the nobodies, the failures, these are the ones whom God has chosen.
God Beneath of Us
Now, I want to make this assertion. The Kingdom of God begins, for us, when we are at the very bottom and there find God Himself, the Almighty, beneath of us, limiting Himself by our weakness, stumbling Himself under our failure. I will love you with a pure heart fervently from no other place. We together will set creation free from no other place.
- God always reveals Himself through weakness, swallowing up into Himself all that we are including our sin and rebellion, becoming us in our present state, limiting Himself by our weakness. Thus, carrying us inside Himself, stumbling and falling along the way, He arises out of death into life, ascending on high, and we inside of Him. -
Christ Is All
There is an overwhelming ABSOLUTE as to why the Kingdom must begin for each one of us, right here, in the depths of our searing and personal INABILITY. If Christ is not ALL, then Christ is not anything.
Nicene Christianity presents an in-part Christ to in-part problems and comes up with in-part solutions. There is no in-part Christ. Christ is ALL.
That exercise of knowing Christ living now as me, as ALL that I am, goes in three different directions, to my present self, first, to my past, second, and to all things coming my way, third.
There Is No Beast
Later in this course, I intend to show you that we defeat the Beast by knowing there is no such thing. There is NO government, no United States, no Muslims, no Mexicans, no police, no CIA, no IRS, no Republicans, no Democrats, no whites, no blacks, no Jews, no military, no Pentagon. – Put in the list every conceivable collective in your own world – none of that is real.
Rather, there are 7 billion + individual people walking this earth, and every ONE of them belongs to Jesus alone. And every single one of these individual people is either doing good or doing hurt to one other individual person at a time.
How We Treat Jesus
Every collective, named and unnamed, is a lie designed specifically to get you to see not the individual person in front of you, but to see something “beyond” that individual person, something that cannot be Christ. That “something” does not exist, only Christ speaking them. And how we relate to this individual person is how we are relating with Jesus.
This is the ONLY reality of every individual person on this planet, whether they are enlarging or shrinking their souls. If I do not see Christ in you, that false blindness comes from only one source – I do not see Christ in me, living as me in all I find myself to be.
Two Walking as One
Calling every moment of my present self, “Christ Jesus,” is where I begin.
Now, here is one of many points on which I differ from some who ascribe to “union with Christ.” Many imagine “Christ as me” to mean that they are an isolated extension of God’s person. And thus they go around saying to each other, “Hi, God. How are you doing?” They do not comprehend how terrifyingly ALONE they are imaging themselves to be.
Seeing one’s self as an isolated extension of God’s person is separation, not union; it is aloneness. Union is two walking together as one. Union is Jesus, utterly WITH me.
A Great Mystery
I am not Christ; yet Christ Jesus reveals Himself in, as and through me. It is always He; yet it is always me. This is a great mystery, but I am speaking of Christ and the Church.
So, I begin with seeing Jesus Himself through my every present moment. Then I extend that seeing to see Jesus inside every moment of my past, carrying me utterly through all of it, living as me in this world. Even before I was born again, I was already inside of Jesus in Gethsemane. And every act of sin, He had already become and taken into an empty grave.
I Give Thanks
And then I learn to see Christ Jesus in every circumstance coming my way, that is, Father and I together, making all things good. And so I speak good grace into this Asperger’s crisis that has no answer for me. I speak good grace, knowing that Father is utterly with me in my own dilemma. I give all thanks, I speak good grace, not so that I can become “different,” but because Jesus IS all that I am.
Seeing Christ in every circumstance coming my way is the Kingdom, the beginning of it’s outflow in my life. I am able to do that only because I see Christ first as all that I am and second as every moment of my past, one seamless history of Christ.
Turn Around
Christ as every Word God speaks, Christ as a Spirit of power, Christ as a many-membered body, none of these things can be real FOR me, if I do not know, at every moment, in every circumstance, in all of my stumbling foolishness, Christ as the One who lives now as me. Christ as the One upon whose breast I always lean my head.
But here is one of those many, many places where, by the Atonement, we turn entirely around. For now I see that everything I love, everything that makes my heart sing, every gift I have, every joy I know, is also this same Jesus, and through me, through Christ as me, comes all the fabric, all the shaping of the Kingdom of God as it now appears.
Seeing Ourselves
Sometimes, when these things I teach are written back to me by a reader, in their own words, I can see things better. I want to share one such piece from a reader.
“The veil being removed - that is, we are able to see ourselves as we are. We see the truth and we receive the love of the truth; we receive ourselves, face to face, as we are, torn, bruised and bloodied, unrecognizable as human. We are given images (of Jesus) to help us know ourselves. This is the revelation of Christ, the apocalypse - the revealing of ourselves, to ourselves, by the WORD of God, the Alpha and Omega, through redeeming images. We love these redeeming images. They give us back to ourselves.”
We Are Humbled
“Through the working of grace in us and in our lives, we come to know the splitting that occurred in us, in our inward parts, when we ate of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, when we decided we were “evil” and went about creating another “I” that was “good.” Father, in His mercy, never allows us to stay in this inauthentic self and so, finally, we come to where we do not split from that split, but sit in it with all its destruction, knowing there is only one way to be healed.
“Finally, we are humbled. The redeeming image joins us, through the WORD, to the outside world, created by Him for us. This is the Good News. Truly, Oneness exists, in the most miraculous, wondrous way - through the Alpha and Omega, the LETTERS, making up the words, which become the living WORD in us, through the DOOR, Jesus Christ.”
My Sufferings for You.
Finally, I want to add one more point regarding Christ as us, the point essential to the Kingdom of God flowing out of us. Why would God take me and Him together into this familiar situation of “out of the frying pan into the fire,” when all I want to do is to share Christ with you and to support my family?
I now rejoice in my sufferings for you, and fill up in my flesh what is lacking in the afflictions of Christ, for the sake of His body, which is the church (Colossians 1:24).
On This Rock
I am utterly poured out for your sake.
Now someone might say, “Yeah, right, Yordy, your stupid idiocy is God and you together setting creation free? Your childish inability is God’s travail through you? What proof do you have for such presumption?”
Let it be to you according to your faith. My proof is my faith. I am convinced that everything that I go through Father shares utterly with me. And I am convinced that this God who fills me with all of His fullness IS reconciling the world to Himself BY walking together as One Pperson with me.
And on this Rock, God builds His Kingdom.