48. The Season of Symmorphy I

© 2021 Daniel Yordy
April 2015 – July 2016

A Grandiose Idea
As I sat in my car on April 23, 2015, waiting while James was practicing his French horn with the homeschool orchestra, I was meditating on the Lord. I wanted to know what it means to have another Person living inside of my person, and I needed a new approach to how I would write about such a thing.

The idea came to me that I could write a college-level textbook, and that the discipline of such an endeavor would give me the form I needed to shape the direction of the words flowing out from my heart. And the topic of that first textbook could be only one thing – God’s purpose. – What does God want out from this whole thing?

But I don’t think small, and when I get really excited about something new, ideas flow into me like rivers. I had pen and writing pad, and before the hour was over, five different textbooks had taken shape in my mind, with the first four already outlined chapter by chapter.

Basically, I wanted to cover the topics of all I had written before, not as a re-write, but as something brand new. The first text would be another look at The Ten Most Important Verses of the Bible, only at a much deeper level of exploration. The second text would be a second look at the meaning of Bible words, with the same focus as The Two Gospels. The third text would be Kingdom and the fourth Covenant. The fifth, which did not take form right away, would be Christian Community, that is, Gathering to Life.

Yet all of them would be simply a means of KNOWING this incredible topic, John 14:20 & 23 – You inside of me and I inside of you, that other Persons, Father and Son, are living inside of us, what that means, and what They might be up to in this incredible reality. You see, in my Christian experience, I have never heard anyone raise this question or hardly any mention being made of John 14:20 & 23. It’s as if those two verses don’t exist.

I was so excited. I was off like a dog after a rabbit.

Let me defend my choice of format. I greatly value my years of education, particularly at the graduate level, culminating in my then present work of spinning out literature reviews for doctoral dissertations. I value a disciplined mind; I love working with the minutiae of words and their definitions. I require clear thinking.

None of this is “the carnal mind.” That is, when the mind is a servant of the heart, and when the heart desires to know one thing, that is, the Father, then a disciplined mind is just a tool in the hands of the Spirit of God, the only teacher. More than that, I don’t even come close to the IQ and the discipline of thinking of the writer of Hebrews or even of Paul, yet I write out of the singing of Jesus in my heart, just as they also did.

I rushed home and opened several college textbooks on my desk, going back and forth until the format I wanted became clear. At UT Tyler, I had done a fair bit of on-line college work, and so I also studied what would be the best low-cost online teaching program for me. I chose Moodle; it’s free and easily worked.

I was going full speed ahead with all enthusiasm, and so it took me only several days to pull all this together into a place where my new Bible school, Christ Revealed Bible Institute, could begin. In fact, I first created the www.christrevealedbible.institute website on April 27, 2015 and soon had Moodle up and running inside of it.

Since a college course has 30 sessions of 1.5 hours each, I had divided my first textbook, “The Purpose of God,” into 27 chapters of content, with one chapter for introduction, one for review, and then the final exam. I then apportioned those 27 chapters to the ten most important verses of the Bible. My primary purpose was to take these verses all apart, to look closely at the Greek, and to understand them much more than I had before. I started writing the lessons as soon as I could.

On May 23, I sent out a letter titled, “Yes!! – Another Bible School.” It reads the same as what i just wrote thus far. Now, the life-changing word, “Sustained,” went out on May 10, so I was too busy working on the first course, The Purpose of God, and had skipped a week. My thought was that I wanted all of my readers inside the Moodle school, and that I would not post the lessons I was writing on my regular website, which, at this point, was www.christrevealed.info.

I invited my readers to enroll in the Bible school and juoin with me inside the fellowship.

Around the end of May or the first of June, my “grandiose idea” turned into the purpose of God for my life. I had skipped parts of the introduction, knowing that I wanted it to be at a high level of form, something that would come later. I had written about God’s heart and purpose and then had taken apart the Greek wording of Romans 8:28-30 in Chapter 3. I was now working on the center of Romans 8:29, the defining verse of the entire Bible.

In that center, being made just like Jesus, I pondered this Greek word Paul had invented, a tidbit of information I had found in my Little Kittle Theological Dictionary, the word “symmorphos.” Always before, the mental rule forced upon this word and its English counterpart, “conformed,” was that we were one thing right now, but at some point, far in the future, we would become something entirely different. More than that, God expected us to try our best to become something different now, even while knowing that we cannot, not really. And yes, this is the Nicene meaning for the center of the “gospel.”

I was deeply bothered by that definition, though it was the only one I knew. So I thought, “Inventing a word, okay. Paul just stuck two common word parts together in a new way, something English does all the time” (as in “tele” and “vision” or “micro” and “phone”). Then I thought – “Okay, so what English words do the same thing with ‘SYM.’” And that, of course, is extraordinarily easy. Here, then, is what I wrote, with understanding flowing into me with overwhelming power.

“Symphony” does not mean one sound becoming another sound, but many sounds woven together. “Synchrony” does not mean one time becoming another; it means two things sharing the same time. “Sympathy” does not mean one feeling becoming another feeling; it means two people sharing the same feeling. Symmorphos does not mean me, now one thing, becoming some other form, it means two people, Jesus and I, becoming one form. It means utterly braided together.

Anglicizing Greek words when translating the Bible into English is a common practice; William Tyndale had no English word when he translated Luke’s account of Gethsemane, and so he simply turned the Greek word into English, and thus “agony” entered the English language. Baptism, presbyterian, eucharist, are more examples of the same practice.

By the end of the next chapter, “Covenant Core,” I simply continued the tradition by turning symmorphos, the word at the center and heart of Paul’s gospel, the defining word of all the intentions of God All-Carrying, into symmorphy and symmorphosed – formed together with, having the same form, being fashioned together. Not long after, my first text changed in title from “The Purpose of God” to Symmorphy I: Purpose.

This was the end of the school year, however, a year of completion for both Katrina and Johanna, and so let me bring that in before we continue with Christ Revealed Bible Institute.

Completion for Katrina and Johanna
The end of May marked the completion of Katrina’s high school years, all of which had been spent at C.E. King High School, in the same buildings where I had taught. After four years of returning into this school for Katrina, I had become fully reconciled to it.

Katrina was in the top ten percent of her class, and so, prior to graduation, the school put on a special dinner for that group. Maureen and I attended with Katrina. After the dinner there were various presentations.

Superintendent Vicki Giles was participating in the dinner and celebration. This was the lady who first hired me at C.E. King and in whose home I had spent a couple of weeks. She had been superintendent for eight years, which means she was good at her job. This was her last year with Sheldon as well. After the dinner I spoke briefly with Dr. Giles. For a moment there was a recognition of knowing one another in a shared connection of love for children and for teaching. She spoke well of Katrina. The moment was not to be prolonged, and so I returned to my table. But I have treasured that sense of a shared professional love ever since. I see now that Vicki Giles is an instructor and dean at Houston Baptist College, teaching Curriculum and Instruction. I do envy her, just a bit, though in a good way. I know that my own season inside those realms will return again.

We attended Katrina’s graduation in the huge auditorium used by many districts, the same place I had attended the first year I taught at C.E. King.

Through this summer, I had my final literature review for Dr. Claudia, but for some reason, I was not finding any clear-thinking mornings enabling me to work on it. Weeks went by and it was not finished. Meanwhile, Dr. Claudia had found a buyer for her business, another lady, and was in the process of transferring all the work over to her. To my amazement, she showed extraordinary patience towards me and allowed me to keep trying to complete it.

Johanna had more coursework in her cosmetology program through the summer, but completed it by August and received her associate’s degree. Meanwhile she had chosen to return to Upsala, Ontario that August in order to teach in the Upsala Christian School. Johanna is, at heart, a wilderness girl.

James had the opportunity this summer to spend a couple of weeks with Maureen’s cousins and Aunt JoEllen Miller in Stephenville, Texas. He managed to go flying off a dirt bike and broke his collar bone, so we had to work through that over the phone. He was well-taken care of.

Christ Revealed Bible Institute
Somewhere around twenty people signed up for the first course in Christ Revealed Bible Institute, the text that became Symmorphy I:Purpose. I was still writing it. As I completed each chapter, I would upload all of its parts including assignments. Then, the “learners” would go through it and post their responses in the forums. This way, different ones could read other’s responses and share back and forth.

About half of those who signed up did not participate. This was astonishing to me, for my website is my living room. Why would people sign up and then not visit with those gathered together? As an Asperger’s man, this was a difficult puzzle to me.

Around a dozen people did participate, and about half of that inside every chapter. This small number, however, made a wonderful fellowship. Ed Carter joined with me as a mainstay in the fellowshipping. He is fun, talkative, and welcoming. Joan Reilly, whom I had met in our visit to the Novek’s, participated fully. Her expression of the things God was teaching her through the lessons I had written was heart-filled and very encouraging. Lida Lindeque, from South Africa, was a regular participant, one who encouraged me very much as well. Andrea, from Austria, was new to this word. Several of the others shared good things with her as we went forward. Susan Ryan from Canada also shared some as well as Annalize Mouton from South Africa.

There were a couple of brothers whom I had not known who signed up and participated for a little while, but they soon vanished. One I had to remove because his posts were not of the Spirit.

Meanwhile, I was no longer sending out what I was writing to my larger email list of nearly 180 people by this time because the lessons of Symmorphy I: Purpose were supposed to be reserved for those inside the Moodle course. I sent out two letters in June and one in July, encouraging people to join us inside the online Bible Institute. I don’t remember anyone else joining with us. Finally, by the first of August, I could no longer bear with the many not being able to read the wonderful things the Lord was giving me to write.

And so I placed all the lessons on my regular website for all to enjoy. On August 2, I sent out the first part of several lessons in Chapters 3-7 in my Christ Our Life letter with links to the website. At this same time, I was converting Christrevealed.info to the present CMS form called OCPortal (now called Composr). By the end of August, I was sending out complete lessons in the regular email post.

At the same time, I was reading the lessons from Symmorphy I: Purpose to my family each Sunday morning, gathered in the living room. Will Fonder joined with us for these sessions and was much blessed by the word I was sharing. He and I continued to have many good and long talks. At a certain point, however, he no longer came. I think that the word had filled his ability to receive. I am confident that it is continuing to work inside his heart.

Through October, however, just past halfway through the course, the participation inside the Moodle learning platform diminished and finally ceased. “One Day in Gethsemane,” sent out on October 18, was the last really good involvement together inside that small fellowship. I do not have the ability to keep a gathering going, to keep everyone encouraged and involved. I am a good teacher, but someone else must gather the students and keep them in front of me. This lack is very sad to me, but I place it utterly into my Father’s hands, for He shares all things with me.

Although the entirety of Christ Revealed Bible Institute is still there and available, nothing of any consequence has happened inside of it since.

The Next School Year
Johanna flew up to Upsala in August to begin an exciting new chapter of her life as a school teacher. She began her first school year with two students, one in grade 5 and the other in grade 6. She would teach these two grades for the next three years.

Katrina was determined to enter a good drama program in her first year of college and thus cast her eyes on Lamar University in Beaumont, Texas, as it had been her high school drama teacher’s school. We made a family trip of it in August, going to inspect the campus. We were given a tour of the campus and of the drama department. It was a lovely place and seemed a good choice to us. We did not know how we could pay for it, but we were hoping.

I had shared with Katrina more than once how I trusted her that her understanding was good and that we would support whatever her decision was. Not long before school was to start, she shared with us her realization that the Lamar campus was beyond our price range and that she had chosen the local San Jacinto Community College, which had a decent theater program at its central campus in Pasadena. She could remain living at home and the Pell Grants would pay for the costs of her college tuition.

I gave Katrina the use of the Suburban, and she began to drive down to Pasadena for her first of two years of college.

James continued in the homeschool orchestra in Spring, the homeschool co-op in Kingwood, and one day a week doing volunteer work at Jesse Jones park. The orchestra teacher also conducted training sessions once a week in Katy for those who lived over there. James and I both wanted him to have more involvement, and so we often drove over to Katy, an hour’s drive to the far other side of the Houston area, a second time a week for that practice session. All of this had to be coordinated with Katrina’s use of the Suburban, and so I was quite busy driving my kids around.

We added two things to James’s schooling, however. First, Katrina drove the Suburban into the back of a stopped semi that crushed in the front metal all the way around. The insurance company totaled it, but I loved that Suburban and, because the engine and frame were not affected, I took less money and kept the vehicle. I gave the job of rebuilding it to James as part of his schooling. He did an excellent job, and we got to keep the Suburban for a while longer.

Then, I signed James and myself up to a cave-exploring Meetup group and we joined their meetings a couple of times at a rock wall gym about halfway to Katy. James was too young for them to accept his presence with them on an actual spelunking expedition, and so we stopped going. James did discover a love for rock wall climbing, and so we stopped there a number of times. He continues that sport to this day.

In September, I finally completed my last literature review for Dr. Claudia Sheets. At this point the transfer of her business to the other lady was complete. Part of the reason it took me so long was a blockage I felt towards giving my mind towards secular topics. I confess that writing Symmorphy I: Purpose was a distraction. It’s very hard for me to do both.

I now had no more income. Maureen continued to provide for us by long hours caring for Mrs. Turner who was not an easy person to assist.

Participate in Ministry
Through this summer and fall two other brothers began to connect with my website and what I share. One was Bayila Dalaky from northwestern Nigeria. I communicated with Bayila a number of times over the next few years and sent him a number of my books. At the present time, Bayila no longer has good access to the Internet, which is sad, for he is a good friend and I had hoped he could continue to be involved with our present fellowship.

The other brother was Christopher Küttner of Germany. Christopher had been searching the Internet for a soundness of truth. In that search, he had come across some of the ministries of the move. He did an Internet search on some of those names and thus found my website. He decided to critique me on the basis of what I wrote about “the antichrist.” What I shared about that topic rang true to him as sound, and so he continued reading and not long after began to communicate with me by email. Christopher connects with the breadth of my understanding of this world with an intellectual mind, but he also has a heart that longs to know the Lord.

Another sister from North Carolina, Rachelle Ross, began to communicate with me by email a bit. She had been searching to know the Lord and had witnessed to an article of mine posted on some other website. Finally, in August, she typed in a Google search on “what is eating of Christ.” That search took her straight to my website and my article “Eating of Christ,” which is found in Gathering to Life. What she found on my website was a real and broad table of that for which her heart was longing.

Meanwhile, Rita Robinson of Wisconsin and Karen Leigh of Cape Town, South Africa, continued regular email communication with me, although they had not joined into the Christ Revealed school. Dennis Rhodes has also been a regular communicator with me.

My inability to maintain a living fellowship inside of Internet long-distance sharing meant that I was now back to just sending out the lessons of Symmorphy I: Purpose as my regular Christ Our Life letter.

Then on December 20, I sent out a letter titled “Participate in Ministry.” I want to quote a bit from it to give an understanding of how I felt about the word God was giving to me. (I have reduced and thus pieced this rendition together.)

Ever so slowly, I have accepted a mantle of “place” from the Father upon my shoulders. I have been able to do that only because of those of you who write to me out from a confirming prophetic spirit encouraging me to believe that God is, in fact, sharing His word through me. It is you, my readers, who give me “place,” and you do so only as you hear Jesus speaking to you from your own heart as you read or listen to what I share.

Last spring, I began to sense that the season of how I had been writing was changing into a new approach to the Word of Christ. I knew that I wanted to write about living together as one person with the Father, but to write in a specific and disciplined manner.

Writing these lessons in the course, Purpose of God, and in this format, writing that comes out from my discovery of what this wondrous word, Symmorphy, really means, and how we are connected utterly together as one person with the Father, through every word that is Jesus, has just electrified my life. I may have known life before, but now I know that snapping of electricity and the exploding of glory as I write every lesson. I am simply astonished when I complete each one. I sit here in overwhelming awe and wonder.

For now, God has limited and confined me to one expression only, to sit here in front of my computer screen and to write. And in this limited place, God does one thing for me, He opens up His Word to me, filling me with the joy of Jesus singing in my heart. Yet part of my gift from God is that I become obsessed with what fills my heart, and I pursue that obsession with unflagging zeal.

That brings me to the title of this letter: Participate in Ministry. It is my conviction, born out of absolute enthusiasm, that I should write these five [Symmorphy] volumes, making them available, not only online, but also as hard copy “textbooks.” And, besides writing, to make what I write more known, that many more who long to know Jesus as He really is in them, will be able to find it.

My job is to establish the Spirit WORD that is Jesus Sent, connecting each of us as one person together with the Father, and connecting us together as one body, walking in love, the revelation of Father forever. My job is to prepare a highway, a straight path, so that those rushing into Tabernacles and the Father rushing into them, might connect together freely and truly without any hindrance or blockage.

Someone from Kansas, a reader whom I do not know and who is not on my mailing list, sends me a check for $100 every month and has done so for around two years now. I deeply appreciate that gift and use it to cover the present costs of the websites and to send out a few books to those who ask. Sometimes it has gotten us out of an immediate financial hole.

If 15-20 people were to take on themselves the same ministry from the Lord, committing to sending a set amount each month, then $1500 + a month would be sufficient provision for me to show my wife that my time spent writing is indeed contributing to our family’s needs. This is what I really want to do. And I am asking of you to help me do it.

~~~

At the end of the letter, I asked my readers to consider setting up regular monthly donations through PayPal. I sent this letter out just as I drove north again to Canada, making the trip still caught in the dilemma of my providing nothing for our family’s needs.

Another Trip North
In December James spent a couple of more weeks with the Miller cousins in Stephenville. This time, he shot a deer, which he brought home for us to process. That was quite a job. He had also agreed to go with them on a medical missionary trip into northern Mexico the first part of March.

Johanna had waited to make her final decision of where to live, but now she wanted to move all her stuff up to Upsala. She flew down and we rented a small Budget truck into which we loaded all her things. Johanna and I then drove the truck up to Canada together. I had forgotten that it was winter in the north, and so we had to stop at a thrift store in northern Minnesota for me to buy a winter coat. That was not the last time I had to do the same thing. On our second night on the road, Johanna and I stayed in a lovely little cabin just north of Duluth. In fact, this whole trip was a wonderful time of sharing with my daughter, and we conversed much together.

When we arrived at the South Farm in the Upsala communities, it was full winter, with a few feet of snow covering everything. The Upsala communities continue to be a big part of Maureen’s and my life, and so I want to share a bit about them. First, here is a map of the larger area.



The Upsala Christian Community was divided into three small communities each of which shared meals together. Yet all three gathered together for the worship services, usually at the South Farm, which was the largest of the three. The Community Hall near the West Farm belonged to the secular town of Upsala, but that is where larger meetings were held, including Johanna’s graduation. The Upsala Christian School was located on the property of the North Farm. This is where Johanna would be teaching.

For most of her time at Upsala, Johanna has lived on the South Farm. Here is a layout of that community, which I use as a model in my book, Symmorphy V: Life. The land slopes down from the gardens to Lang Lake, and thus the lake is in the view of any north-facing windows.



Through the three years Johanna had lived at South Farm while she was going to school and after, she stayed in the home of Ray and Paula Brumbach, which is the single wide trailer on the far left. It was in this home, when we came up for Johanna’s graduation, where I wrote “Filled with God” in The Kingdom Rising. Johanna had returned to her same room with the Brumbach’s. I stayed in their guest bedroom, an addition onto the trailer. On this trip, I was writing the chapters on setting creation free in Symmorphy I: Purpose.

As I have shared before, the brethren of the Upsala Community had set aside some of the poorer practices of move community and retained the better practices. That is, it was a place of genuine love and kindness. Nonetheless, I was again delivering my precious daughter into a move community, this time to live as an adult. I needed to know for certain that it was truly of the Lord.

Besides Ray and Paula Brumbach living at the South Farm, there were John and Gerrie Kiezebrink, the parents of Kitty Kiezebrink who had lived with Dan and Joann Kurtz at Graham River while I was also living there. Their son, Doug, and his family also lived at the South Farm. Ted and Eloise Beebe had an apartment in the upstairs of the Tabernacle. Brother Ted was a musician of the highest level. Barbara Bell, the wife of my friend, Peter, was their daughter. Their oldest son, Paul and his family also lived at the South Farm. Paul Beebe made a living by crafting fine woodworking knives in the shop on the map, which he sold through Lee Valley Tools. Dorothy Richey, whom I had known at Graham River, was also living at the South Farm, with some others. Then, Steve and Cindy Schneider lived at the West Farm, with their children, including Matthew, who had been in the same class at school with Johanna. Another of the Beebe sons, Eric and Barbara Beebe, also lived at the West Farm. Sister Barbara was the principal of the school and would be overseeing Johanna’s foray into teaching.

I spent many hours visiting with Ray and Paula Brumbach through all the times I spent in their home. We visited about the Lord and about teaching school (Paula was a teacher in the Upsala School), and about our community and wilderness experiences. There was no sectarian spirit in the Upsala Community. I was received fully as a brother in the Lord who loved Jesus no different from any of them. I shared my books with several. Ray, especially, devoured my book The Feast of Tabernacles. I also visited with John Kiezebrink and shared some of my books with him. John was a warm and welcoming brother and received all that I shared with joy.

The next morning after our arrival, actually January 1, 2016, a number of brothers came to help us move all of Johanna’s things from the Budget rental truck up into the upstairs above Paul Beebe’s shop. During the day, I went with Johanna to see her new classroom in the school. This was very exciting to me to see her following her mom and dad into the joy of teaching.

That evening, I sat with Johanna at the dinner table in the South Farm Tabernacle. I describe this Tabernacle in Symmorphy V: Life as a wonderful example of a well-designed place for the gathering of community. The brothers and sisters gathered around the table this evening were mostly older folks. Yet there in their midst was Johanna, happy and bubbly, and very much a part of their lives. After we were done eating, no one was in a hurry to leave. I did not talk, but just observed how the conversation was filled with so much knowing of one another and so much receiving of Johanna back into their togetherness. This is the knowing of one another that I share of that is central to the life and revelation of God. Of truth, I knew that I was beholding the very face of Jesus Christ.

As I walked back to the Brumbach’s home with Ray, I said to him, “You know, Ray, I think that the brethren here need Johanna’s bubbly youth as much as she needs your older wisdom.” He replied, “Yes, that’s exactly right.” I went to sleep that night knowing that God had brought Johanna to the right place and that she was utterly safe inside of Him and this precious family.

I drove the Budget Rental truck back to Duluth on Saturday, to drop it off at a Budget place near the Duluth airport. There my brother Glenn picked me up and I went to spend the rest of the weekend in their home. My flight back to Houston would be on Monday.

Glenn was prospering in his construction business, both work he continued to do with Mark Alesch and other connections he made himself. He had done a fair bit of work for a wealthy neighbor and thus he and Kim were able to purchase a very nice house and small property a few miles up the road from Meadowlands, near the small community of Toivola. The house was quite comfortable, although Glenn was doing a fair bit of work to it. He was also building a nice large shop. Their property sloped down to and bordered Sand Creek, a branch of the St. Louis river.

I had a wonderful visit with Glenn. In fact, I felt that for the first time, we were truly knowing one another as brothers. Glenn shared a lot about how he was prospering. The result was that, when I retired to my bed down in the basement amongst all their yet-unpacked stuff, I began to feel quite sorry for myself. The depths of self-pity as I had once known came upon me. I could only contrast my failure and weakness with Glenn’s strength and success.

Yet, although I felt like a complete failure in my inability to provide for my family and my dependence on Maureen to work long hours away from home, I did not leave it there. I placed all of that into Jesus and all of Jesus into me, carrying me, and there I rested, though in deep sorrow. Glenn and Kim knew none of that, of course, and after the weekend of wonderful visiting, Kim drove me to the airport on Monday morning and I flew home to Houston.

Not long after, Maureen and I received a letter from Matthew Schneider asking for our permission to begin walking out a year with Johanna. Matthew had loved Johanna from the first times together in class at school (and even sooner), but once they graduated, Johanna had distanced herself from any further relationship, and so Matthew had to wait a few years. Waiting is good. Maureen and I gladly gave our permission and they began their year on January 31, 2016.

A Trip to Nashville
Also in January, I started getting emails from two new readers in Australia, two elderly sisters, Wilhelmina Van der Hoek (Willie) and Cora van Beelen. These two had a long history in both Pentecostal and ultimate reconciliation circles, and their love for Jesus and excitement over the word I was sharing was quite an encouragement to me.

Soon after my return home, I made plans to drive up to Nashville, Tennessee, to spend a few days’ fellowship with Ed Carter and his wife, Dora. To help me with that trip, Ed and Dora were the first to respond to my request for financial help with a regular monthly donation.

Not long after, I began to receive a monthly donation from Rachelle Ross as well, a donation which has continued until today. It’s not the money that counts, though it helps pay the bills, but rather the gift of herself. Rachelle is very much a part of the ministry of Christ through me. God has always given me just what is needed, and I give Him all thanks.

I now realize that, in having me place my self-pity into Jesus, God took it from me and thus opened the door to my being free to receive His provision.

Then in mid-March, I drove the now-repaired Suburban to Nashville. In fact, I finally caved in and bought myself a less expensive smart phone for this trip. I don’t like phones, but I did need to communicate on the road.

Actually, I drove James to Stephenville first, so that he could go on the medical missions trip to Mexico with Maureen’s cousins. Then I spent the next night at a state park in southern Arkansas. I found the Suburban to be very comfortable for staying in. Needless to say, I picked the route that enabled me to collect more counties for my map. Yet I also felt carried inside of a bubble of grace the whole trip.

Ed and Dora Carter had a nice apartment in a larger apartment complex in a small town just to the east of Nashville. I stayed with them for four days, in their spare bedroom. Ed is fun and talkative and he loved the word I share. We visited non-stop for hours and hours. I also noticed several copies of my books all dog-eared and tattered from having been poured over.

I had thought to also drive up into Ohio to visit with David Wenger, but instead, he drove down to Nashville and spent a couple of nights in a nearby motel. Thus for about a day-and-a-half, David Wenger was part of our non-stop fellowship. I set before both brothers my need to have someone with the gift I don’t have of bringing people together to do that for me and for the word God was giving me. Both were receptive to that need and were willing to consider it. David suggested that I put together radio episodes. He had connections in the Christian radio industry and could help with that. Making such a thing actually happen, however, was a bit beyond what has been practical since then, and so nothing more came of these things.

Nonetheless, I was very excited at the time in my expectation of God that these connections would continue into something real and ongoing. Our fellowship together was rich and very strengthening to all of us. One thing I noted in my conversation with Ed, however, was that when I shared about Christian community, a wall went up in his face. He was not receptive to that part of what I teach and so I did not pursue it.

While I was in Ed and Dora’s home, I received a communication from Christopher Küttner in Germany, in which he suggested to me some ideas for an online business that might provide for our needs. I accepted this council as from the Lord and so became very excited about it.

On the way back to Houston, I went into the Ozark region of northern Arkansas. Some readers had suggested I meet with a brother there who had a small community and who ministered deeper truth. I cannot remember the brother’s name. I did find them and spent a couple of nights there in a bunk house. It was a strange experience, but they finally warmed up to me a bit and I was able to share some good things. I left a copy of The Feast of Tabernacles with the brother and continued on back home.

After returning home, I then created a couple of new websites in line with Christopher’s ideas and spent a few weeks working on them. As I continued, however, the work became harder and harder for me until I simply could not do one more thing in that direction. And so that “great idea” also came to nothing.

Then, out from my visit with him, Ed began calling me on the phone about once a week or so to continue our fellowship. I usually don’t do well talking on the phone, but Ed was just the kind of person who made it possible and good for me. These phone calls became a much-needed strength and encouragement to me over the next couple of years.

The Next Parts of Symmorphy
In March, I wrote the final chapter of Symmorphy I: Purpose and thus began Symmorphy II: Essence, a look at the meaning of key Bible words, especially of “God,” “Christ,” and “salvation.” In April, I started Symmorphy III: Kingdom as well, because I had placed a study of John 17, the prayer that birthed the kingdom, into that outline, but I needed that study before I could continue with Essence. Once those three chapters were done, I found that attempting to write two books at the same time was not working for me and so I continued with Essence only. Needless to say, that study of John 17 is one of the more important things I have written.

Meanwhile, I continued to fill in the educational parts of Symmorphy I: Purpose in order to prepare it for printing. This was a much bigger job on this first text because I was devising everything. With the later Symmorphy texts, I simply followed that same pattern of the first. I completed that work and published the print copy through Amazon the first part of May 2016. The chapters of Symmorphy II: Essence were my focus, then, until I completed that text in October of 2016.

I want to share briefly just how important writing the Symmorphy I: Purpose was in my ongoing journey to know the Lord. This was the first time that I had done an in-depth, phrase by phrase and word by word study of these verses that I am convinced God intends to be the rule of how we understand everything. I discovered so many things I had never seen before, huge things. I also realized that I did not know anything about Hebrews 10, and it took me some time to work through the wording to even know what it was saying.

Even though everyone of these verses became much larger in my understanding and in how I related with God, still, it would be the writing of four more Symmorphy texts before I could truly say that I understand the basic meaning of these verses and how they fit together.

Strange Distractions
One thing of note through this time was that, after disconnecting with Chris Welch on Facebook, and as part of an effort to draw people to Christ Revealed Bible Institute, I began accepting the many “friend” requests coming my way on Facebook. Requesting to be “friends” with someone else is outside of my ken, however.

And thus over a year or so, I “friended” nearly 5,000 people on Facebook, the limit that was allowed. I learned immediately that each one of those friend requests must be looked at, and so I did scroll through the home page of all of those thousands of people. I did not “friend” any who promoted an attachment to this world or who spoke condemnation against other Christians.

The result of this exercise was small. It did put the word I was sharing before many, but the unhelpful responses quickly became confusing noise to me. I have bailed out of making use of Facebook several times, and I almost never look at the general feed being posted by all those thousands of “friends.” The few times I did, I read awful things being spoken by fellow Christians that simply overwhelmed me.

But what I did see was a snapshot view of the Church of Jesus Christ across the English-speaking world. I would guess that about a third were American or European, about a third were African, and about a third were South or East Asian. But of all of these, I would guesstimate that only about ten percent evidenced in their words an actual love towards the Lord Jesus Christ.

On July 31, I received a Facebook message from Dr. Cecil Cockerham, a brother who lived in the Katy area on the far other side of Houston, and who attended the Grace Pointe Community Church on Dairy Ashford, with Pastor Don Keithley. We had visited this church not long before to hear Francis Du Toit of South Africa minister the word.

Dr. Cecil had helped to create an online school called American Seminary and had made a good living from it. He was switching over to developing a similar school with the church and wanted to sell American Seminary to someone who would benefit from it. He had read some of my stuff on Facebook and felt to offer it to me.

I went to meet with Dr. Cecil in a restaurant and there he explained the school to me and his reasons for selling it. This was very interesting to me and again, I was desperate for a way to provide for my family and willing to embrace anything that might be the Lord.

A red flag for me came up in our discussion, however, and that is that Dr. Cecil was not willing to share any financial data for the business with me. When I pressed him with the fact the you don’t buy a business without a look at its finances, he refused. Later I learned that not long before he had inadvertently deleted the entire website and had to pay his technician to recreate everything. All the records of prior students were thus lost.

Nonetheless, I wrote up a proposal for my involvement in the business that included Dr. Cecil continuing to help with marketing. I went again to visit with Dr. Cecil at a dinner in a restaurant, this time with Maureen. Pastor Don Keithley of Grace Pointe Church was also part of our meeting. They expressed that my proposal was great, if I had put a down payment on the business. Dr. Cecil wanted $25,000 down and a total of $125,000 over time. My only option was to work with Dr. Cecil to see if we could generate an income by signing up more students.

On August 17, I sent out a letter titled “My New Job!!!” I was really excited about this direction at first and received it as an open door from the Lord. I was ready to pursue anything that might be God’s provision for us and for the word I share.

De. Cecil gave me full access then into the website and the courses on offer, which were also delivered through Moodle. I recast a number of the website pages and began to look closely at the courses. This was a two-year program and cost the client $2400. Dr. Cecil had made a lot of money from it in the past.

However, as I looked closely at the courses, I realized that the quality was way too poor for me. I would have to redo everything. More than that, it seemed to me that the total value of everything in the “business” could be no more than $5000, not $125,000, especially since there were no present students. Dr. Cecil assured me that my Facebook friend count of 5000 would be more than enough to get large numbers of students.

I sent copies of Symmorphy I: Purpose to Pastor Keithley and to Dr. Cecil, and part of my visiting with them was about the online Grace school they were starting in the church. This school already included a number of anointed ministries, some of whom were in my Facebook list. I expressed an interest in being part of that larger Bible school, but no response ever came back to me.

In the end, I became uncomfortable with what seemed to me to be a religious manipulation on the one hand and an impractical business idea on the other hand. I could easily create my own school for a few hundred dollars; why did I need a half-broken idea from someone else? I placed the fault upon myself, however, and quietly bowed out.

Nonetheless, this concept of a larger online Bible school was still very exciting to me and so I began to turn Christ Revealed Bible Institute into something more. Of course, business is marketing and I am unable to promote myself. A good salesman signs up all kinds of people to something poor and makes good money. Someone like me, who creates something of great value, but can’t sell it, remains poor.

The truth is, however, that I had to look up Grace Pointe Church’s online Bible school in order to remember some of the names. I realized that I have felt a contempt in this direction from then until now.

“Lord Jesus, I place this feeling of contempt entirely into You. I know that You think more highly of these brethren than You do of Yourself and that You share that same love with me. Lord Jesus, I bless Dr. Cecil and all these brethren with all my heart.”

Where Do I Belong?
As I am writing this little bit in June of 2022, I have a better understanding of the direction God is taking me than I had in 2016. For that reason, I can see more clearly how to place the meaning of this time I am calling “The Season of Symmorphy.”

Where I “belong” had not come into view and would not do so until October of 2019, and even then only in its first parts. Through this season of writing these five Symmorphy textbooks, God was doing two things inside of me. First the actual writing itself was grounding me in the Bible, in what God actually says and means, in the Word of truth written all through my knowing. This foundation would become a burning fire inside of me to make the gospel clear on the one hand and the false gospel clear just as much on the other hand.

But the other thing God was doing was through my outward circumstances and my eager, but oft misguided desire to be part of something real. He was removing something from me and replacing it with something else. At the time, however, I could not have known the meaning of either one.

Yet I am convinced now that these things, both the clarity of word and what God was preparing inside of me, are essential to the entire Christian Church now and through the Age of Tabernacles.